February 4, 2006

Yesterday morning at 6:53am my dearest mom passed away in my arms, lost her fight against cancer. Her struggle lasted 13 months. The last 3 weeks in hospital were just a slipping away a little more on a daily basis. The hospital was kind enough to let us kids stay with mom 24/7 for the last few days. That last night took all my strenght to be with her on her final journey. It broke my heart to see her grasping for her final breaths. Now I experience a sadness I never knew existed. I know she is better off now, I know she found peace but I don't know if I am ready to be without her just yet.

Friday, February 3, 2006, 06:53am

January 16, 2006

Mum is losing the fight against cancer. She's been incredible brave and strong this past 13 months, even managed to put up another Christmas family dinner less than a month ago. But suddenly her body is shutting down and her mind is saying 'I had enouhg of all the pain and suffering, I lost all my dignity and I am ready to let go'.
From her bed in the palliative care hospice she's telling us kids to be strong and not to be sad. I am gonna be strong for you mum, I want you to be surrounded by happy thoughts during your last days. Reminiscing the life you have lived and the life you have given us.
I have never experienced this pain before, it's a sadness which knows no boundaries. I love you mum.